Been a while since we’ve heard anything from the Large Hadron Collider. So, I Googled it. This is all I could find:
That’s funny. The truth is LHC is still doing nothing. It’s still in France. It’s still broken.
I was stunned to find out how easy it is to track a cell phone. Just fill in the blanks and find out for yourself:
This is a classic!
A friend sent me this via email:
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no so uls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities.
- If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
- If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, ‘It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,’ and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct……leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting ‘Oh my God.’
Now, by my own experiences, Hell froze over somewhere around summer 2001. Can’t really go into details of why, but for me it did. Additionally I have always pretty much agreed with the student’s idea of Hell here.
Now you know why I don’t believe all global warming is manmade.
For starters, I can NOT believe someone zoomed in so close as to find this anomoly.
Secondly, noted astronomers and the like have immediately debunked the claim that this is a Martian by asserting that the image is a rock cropping a few feet from the Rover. In other words, it’s too small to be much of a living thing. And, since NASA has been unable to find any semblence of life, even microbial, they must be right huh?
Thirdly, it doesn’t look like a Martian, it looks like Bigfoot.
Lastly, this whole scenario gave me deja vu. Namely, I was gazing into the Mojave a few years ago. Well, this is what I was doing:
Off in the distance, I saw a shimmering light. I didn’t stop for the night. I just thought that must be a rock in the distance. No life would hang out here, it’s nothing but dirt. However, seeing the image of the man on Mars, I thought, that pose looks kinda familar. I mean, how many life forms strike a casual pose in a desert? So, I, like whoever the very bored person who zoomed in on the Rover pic did, zoomed in a LOT closer on my old pic of the desert rocks right about where the shimmering light was. This, is what I found:
It all became clear to me then. The man on Mars is me. And, more importantly, the reason NASA has found no intelligent life on Mars is because they’re rolling around the middle of the Mojave Desert.
I was sent this video by Mrs. Moon:
Now, I watched it intently, as it depicts sad kids. I don’t want Moonlet to be sad. So, I immediately began searching for a cooties inoculation shot. I was flabbergasted when googling “cooties inoculation” I got this profound result:
Now, you can search for almost anything that doesn’t exist and get a bazillion results. So, what’s with getting only one result for something as critical as protecting your kid? The answer was more disturbing to me than the video. THERE IS NO COOTIES INOCULATION SHOT! I had been HAD!
Knowing that, I just watched the video again and chuckled a little. Those kids are great actors!
Well, maybe not physically. But, they might be soon. The latest round started when Leslie Kean of the Coalitio0n for Freedom of Information sued NASA regarding the crash of something in Pennsylvania in 1965. He contends it’s a cover-up. A judge made NASA give him all their documentation. This could be interesting. In what way, I don’t know. But to say the least, UFO peeps are always interesting.
Which leads us to the next headline, Dennis Kucinich claims to have seen a UFO. Now in defense of Dennis, he had a witness. That would be Shirley MacLaine. She says they saw it in her book you have to pay for to read. Needless to say, the combo of Kucinich and MacLaine have led a lot of otherwise less vested peeps to truly believe there was something flying over their heads that evening. However, because he’s still running for President of the United States of America, and therefore would gain control over NASA if elected, this has very serious implications that I think a lot of political pundits have not considered. According to who you ask, LOTS of people believe in UFO’s. If Kucinich harnesses that voter bloc, well, let me just say things could get interesting in the weirdest possible way. Kucinich is kinda nuts if you ask me. Of course, that does not mean squat whether he can be elected or not. Remember Jimmy Carter? Hmmm? See where I’m going with this? Before you claim I’m as screwy as Dennis, Shirley, or Jimmy, read UFO Politics at the White House: Citizens Rally ‘Round Jimmy Carter’s Promise. I haven’t, but the title sounds like what I want to get across.
Now, the reason I am going this route is because there’s a circle forming here. And it looks suspicious to me. I might actually be forming my first full-blown conspiracy theory here. Follow me with this, it’s not too difficult. Kucinich is running pretty much dead last in every poll imaginable. His only real issue is pushing the button how far out there he is. Nothing is moving this guy out of dead last. Whatever he had to say was largely ignored in a hailstorm of publicity for Hillary or Barack. Now, all of a sudden, just before primary season starts sprinting to the finish line, “evidence” from NASA is compelled to be released to the public that MIGHT prove Kucinich isn’t completely off his rocker ( on this one issue anyway ). And, NASA releases THIS pic today:
What’s that look like huh?
I look for NASA to start dropping those out of the sky right before the California primaries.
Me either. But this guy apparently did. This is how he came to a logical conclusion:
Where does THAT fall into intelligent design?
Got this from my favoritest news source, The Onion:
Just read it, it’s a riot. It encapsulates so many angles it’s amazing. I have always enjoyed listening and commenting on Congress, ie non-scientists in general, debate the pros and cons of serious scientific issues. The Onion just nails that angle perfectly.